| Does your marriage revolve around your children | | | | judgmental. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to |
| or grandchildren? Do you and your spouse spend | | | | figure out that if you overreact to what they |
| too much time apart? Have you grown apart? | | | | say, your spouse isn't going to talk to you. |
| Imagine your marriage 20 years from now. How | | | | Try to be accepting and positive of what your |
| is it going to be if you keep up with your current | | | | spouse has to say even if what you hear |
| approach? If you don't like the thought of your | | | | surprises you. If you have a hard time keeping |
| future with its present course, then your marriage | | | | your mouth shut, I suggest you sit on your hands. |
| may need a spring cleaning. | | | | Somehow this simple behavior helps you keep |
| Ernest Holmes said, "Life is a mirror and will reflect | | | | quiet so that you just listen. Remember, one good |
| back to the thinker what he thinks into it." Have | | | | idea could be life changing to your marriage. |
| your thoughts undermined a once great | | | | Be curious and eager to know your spouse all |
| relationship? If so, you can redirect your thoughts | | | | over again. It doesn't take both of you to do the |
| and thus redirect the future of your marriage. | | | | spring cleaning, even though it helps. You'd be |
| Most couples put more effort into the planning of | | | | surprised by what one dedicated spouse can do. |
| their vacation than they do their marriage. | | | | And just like the spring cleaning of your home, |
| Remember the days of dating each other? You | | | | your marriage deserves many cleanings. Keep |
| couldn't get enough of each other and gladly gave | | | | your marriage fresh and alive. Tap into your ability |
| a lot of attention to your partner. After a couple | | | | to dream again. Rediscover the beauty of your |
| gets married they are pulled apart by things like | | | | husband or wife. Take one step today towards |
| their career and the needs of their children. A | | | | the renewing of your marriage. Then take |
| routine develops and if the couple isn't careful, so | | | | another step tomorrow. And so on and so on.. |
| does a sense of boredom. | | | | Here are some additional "cleaning solutions" for |
| Unfortunately, your spouse tends to get blamed | | | | your marriage. |
| for the boredom. But don't be too quick to judge. | | | | 1. Try to see your spouse with fresh eyes. |
| Simply because you have been together for a | | | | 2. Keep your mind focused on your spouse's |
| number of years doesn't mean that you know | | | | positive qualities. |
| your spouse today. People change. As men get | | | | 3. Forgiveness is letting go of the past. Forgiving |
| older, they tend to shift focus from their career | | | | yourself and your spouse is an attribute of the |
| to their family. Women tend to go in the direction | | | | strong. |
| of career because they have put their career | | | | 4. If you are keeping score of your spouse's |
| pursuits on hold for the sake of their children. | | | | mistakes, you are setting your marriage up to fail. |
| The goals you had early in the marriage have | | | | 5. Life is too short to allow boredom to infiltrate |
| probably changed. But your partner may have the | | | | your marriage. |
| assumption that you still want things the way | | | | 6. Good things often come from the difficult |
| they were in the beginning. Especially in the ages | | | | times. |
| between 35 and 55, what's important to you and | | | | 7. Strive to genuinely understand your spouse. |
| what matters most are usually being re-evaluated. | | | | 8. Break your routines to keep the marriage |
| Talk with your partner about what is really | | | | exciting. |
| important to you. What would make your life | | | | 9. Maintain an attitude that encourages openness. |
| more satisfying? Listen to your spouse. Encourage | | | | 10. Strive to find the magic that is waiting to be |
| them to share their views. Be open to what they | | | | discovered in your spouse. |
| say. Don't be too sensitive or defensive. Don't be | | | | |